question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
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