I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
