Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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