it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
