I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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