Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
