Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize