wat bout pragnant strippers??
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
