I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Success! We fucked roommates!
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
