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Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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