Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Randomize
