I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize
