I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
