I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Randomize
