operation harelip BJ is a go
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
