the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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