He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
