Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I'm just crazy horny about you
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
