I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
