u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
