So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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