a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
