Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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