Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
