Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I am one with the molecules
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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