would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
