So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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