toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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