i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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