what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
