So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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