Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
