season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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