Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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