i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
