i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
