Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
