"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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