so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Sext me about skeletons
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
