Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
no. you can't hotbox the world.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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