She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize