so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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