Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
