I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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