I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Is it penis luge time yet?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
