Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize
