Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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