I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
