My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
