i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
